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Death Poems About Humor

Humor death poems and poems about death for Humor. Read and share these heartfelt Humor death poems with loved ones, friends and family members. Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for non-death related poems or Humor Poems.

Poem Details | by Nina Parmenter |
Categories: body, death, humor, humorous,

Squelch


I heard the squelch of death again -
or was it just a neuron firing
deep within my boggy brain,

or possibly a cell expiring
down amongst a mucus mess?
It could have been my heart perspiring

(that may be a thing I guess)
or, deep down in the adipose,
the squealing of a fat-lump pressed

to serve as fuel, and I suppose
it might have been a small mutation -
“Pop!” (we get a lot of those),

a bronchiole’s sharp inhalation,
“Hiss!” a membrane’s gooey breath,
a bile-duct’s bitter salivation...

Probably, it wasn’t death.


29 Mar 2019


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: funeral, humor, sad,

FUNERAL FOOTLES

Deceased Released Goodbye I cry Church pew Hurts you My bum Now numb No droppin* The coffin! 4th March 2015 Written before dad’s funeral - I'll take my cushion to sit on lol * not proper footle but I had to add it!

Poem Details | by Carolyn Devonshire |
Categories: fear, humor, inspirational,

A Fear Greater than Death

There is just one thing people fear more than death
Speaking before an audience

Really, more than death?

Poem Details | by arthur vaso |
Categories: beauty, cute love, grave, humor, obituary,

I Found a Girlfriend

Took me the breath of all my life
A soul mate who could consume my heart wither a smile
I found that Gothic girl after dark
A little to late to consummate
I lie in waiting with a dead round smile
Empty eyes and a lot of guile
I found a girlfriend even if late
We lie together
Frigid is our state


Poem Details | by Daniel Turner |
Categories: appreciation, death of a friend, humor,

Death of a Friend

There were no tears of sorrow when she passed
No suffering or pain, a quiet death
Though many questioned just how long she'd last
Few noticed when she took her final breath

So many photographs and memories
With family and friends while she was here
She shared her time and warmth so willingly
Forever will we hold her days so dear

Though she has passed we will continue on
There will be many gloomy days ahead
Some days her memory will flash at dawn
And some nights when we crawl into our bed

For now let's raise our glass at summer's wake
Cause soon it will be autumn's leaves we'll rake



     original poem by Daniel Turner

Poem Details | by Danitra David |
Categories: death, humor,

Someone get the door

Death knocks on the door
He is not cloaked with a sickle 
He only wants a slice 

Poem Details | by Sunshine Smile |
Categories: death, humor,

- Lifeless -




From one second to the next
Love is our strength and honor, while we are still alive

The body feels cold and stiff
Searching for heart beat ... breathe ... pulse
One, two, three .... one, two, three
Please

With eyes full of tears
One, two, three .... one, two, three
Fearing the silence ... and darkness

Power failure
... I did my best










24.02.2017
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved

Poem Details | by Lochan Chugh |
Categories: death, emotions, fear, humor, life, loneliness, sun,

Let's die

It was a height of 250 metres,
But I wasn’t afraid;
I looked down
And there wasn’t even my shade.

The sun was already jumping
But with a low speed,
“ I can perform better,
 I am not going to give the lead.”

Took a deep breath
And I was in air,
Time stopped,
And silence reached there.

The sun began moving upward,
Or I began moving downward,
I was flying,
But like a dead bird.

When from the ground,
I wasn’t really high;
Mind said,“ change in plan,
Let the sun first die”.

Poem Details | by cheryl hoffman |
Categories: anxiety, death, humor, money,

Death and Taxes

Now that I'm dead I can finally relax,
worry free of April 15th and filing my income tax.




3-22-17

Poem Details | by ravi kiran |
Categories: cheer up, death, hilarious, humor, humorous, journey, muse,

Ridicule with death

Is it that time?
my time to go.
do you have a warrant?
wait a while,
till the rain dials down.
Not want to ruin the suit,
need to look my best.
When I meet the under lord,
need to appear my best.
Not want to spend
my afterlife drenched.
if not
can I dry myself 
at the furnace of the hell.
what if?
I go to heaven,
can I pack 
a change of clothes?
Nothing fancy,
long robe and a halo,
may be a scarf too.
let me pack some sausages,
for the long journey ahead.
you seem clueless,
let me talk to your superior,
what is the country code? 
Is it alpha and omega?
no! they put me on hold
to a hold tone,
"Hang it up and see what tomorrow brings."

Poem Details | by Dale Gregory Cozart |
Categories: death, humor,

It's Not Me, It's You

It's true that I could be more lovin'
as I shove you head first in the oven,

but I can't help but feel so elated
that with you your breath is cremated.

7/16/2018

Poem Details | by Paula Goldsmith |
Categories: animal, death, dream, humor, school, teen, youth,

My Ruthless Dreams COLLABORATION

 
Up early and off to school I must go
Full of pep and not too slow,
That was then when I was young
This is now a new age I have begun,
How I hate them as I climb out of bed
Early mornings are for the dead,
Unreasonable I must seem
Unyieldingly demanding where is my coffee cream,
But I did love them bed and pillow
Seems so long ago I dreamed of an armadillo,
Now they‘re ruthless dreams
I just can’t do them with ice cream,
I’m now past my prime teens.
 

8-23-2019   "for contest COLLABORATION sponsored by Line Gauthier"

Poem Details | by Tom Cunningham |
Categories: death, grave, humor,

Unlucky Jim

Beneath lie the remains of unlucky Jim
A great white shark made a meal of him
Fell off his surf board and hit by a wave
Half inside ‘Jaws’ and half in this grave.





Written on 13 September 2018

For a funny epitaph poetry contest
Sponsored by Jesse Rowe.

Poem Details | by Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories: humor,

Perpetual Claustrophobia - An Epitaph

'Neath this sod dwells Mavis who suffered many a phobia

Makes one wonder how she's handling claustrophobia

Poem Details | by Maureen McGreavy The Pigeon Tart |
Categories: death, humor, science,

Days of Ore



    When my parts are no longer my sum
    When I come undone
    I will be iron as blood no more

    Rust in peace



6/12/2020


Poem Details | by Michelle Faulkner |
Categories: death, humor, life, riddle,

Hell Hath No Donuts

If the staff of life

           Is bread, then

Is death gluten-free?

7/17/19




Poem Details | by Tom Cunningham |
Categories: death, humor,

Fred The Baker RIP

In this vault are a few crumbs of crusty old Fred
He got stuck in an oven and got baked with the bread
A very popular man, his friends didn't think twice 
When offered a keepsake, their very own slice.




Written 14 April  2019.

Not for contest.

Poem Details | by SKAT A |
Categories: abuse, animal, bullying, death, funny, humor, imagination, water,

BUNNY

    -Bunny Hole- by:SKAT

hidden muddy home
dirty paws, good boy' good boy!
yummy with carrots :)

----------------------------

  -Unwanted Fluffiness- by:PD

Big Brown Burlap Bag
drop Bunnies down By the Bay
Better off -Blue grave



~SKAT & PD~

Poem Details | by Carolyn Devonshire |
Categories: football, humor, sports,

Eulogy for a Quarterback's Reputation

We're angry!  What sports fan can blame us?

There hasn't been one loss for Jameis

     But off-the-field ruckus

     Makes sportscasters muck us

Once famous, now Jameis just shames us






*Written about former FSU quarterback Jameis Winston's run ins with the law.

Poem Details | by Dorian Petersen Potter |
Categories: crazy, death, funny, hilarious, horror, humor, humorous,

Lizzie Borden

(Limerick)

When Lizzie (Borden) saw what she's done
Thought to herself that was so much fun
So she whack them again
And again and again
Then laughed aloud at what she's done!


Dorian Petersen Potter
Aka ladydp2000
Copyright@2014


09.16.2014

Poem Details | by Timothy Hicks |
Categories: anxiety, bereavement, courage, fear, humor, loneliness, nature,

Is Humanity That Bad

"Is humanity that bad?" pondered the lighthouse keeper, frightened with the sea




Written March 27th, 2016
For the See or Feel Contest Hosted by Poet Destroyer

Placed 2nd

Poem Details | by Mark J. Halliday |
Categories: absence, childhood, chocolate, death of a friend, humor, political, satire,

Muppet eulogy

Bye Cookie Monster!
Pointlessly martyred by the
Political left.

Poem Details | by hija de la luna |
Categories: bereavement, death, family, funeral, humor,

In a wine bottle

They hate his drinking -
       But they put his ashes in …
A wine bottle urn.


7/21/14

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: car, eulogy, humor,

''Sicilia'' your breaking my heart OR his final ''hit''

Filled plate of grilled tortellini 
Killed the great James Gandolfini
This star's carcass heavy  
A Ford or a Chevy
Should have been a Lamborghini

Poem Details | by Diane Lefebvre |
Categories: anxiety, death, evil, grave, humor,

Fearful Things

I walked on by a graveyard, very late, alone one night.
No ghosts sprung from their moldy graves: no evil ghoulish sights.

It seemed no vampires lurked about, to sip my blood like wine.
And any hulking werewolves must have previously dined.

I watched in vain for zombies, with their gruesome, bloody stares.
But they seemed to be as plentiful, as wayward teddy bears.

Yet, I would duck behind a tree, on guard quite through and through,
At every car that passed me by . . transporting who knows who?

While I recalled what mother said, no doubt with some misgiving:
It’s not the dead you have to fear . . but watch out for the living!


© 2015 Diane Lefebvre